I was shocked. I mean, I knew I might have some slight separation sadness in dropping off baby girl, and leaving her, with people who were not her family or friends (yet) and then picking her up at a later time.
It’s normal. But the last few weeks, hell, months, I’ve been eagerly in anticipation of what these childless hours would mean to me – freedom, and much needed ‘me’ time. Every time baby girl has played up in recent weeks, I’ve scoffed and said “wait ’til you go to kinder! You won’t get away with that!”
And then suddenly, it was Wednesday night. I was anxious. Everything felt rushed. How had everything fast forwarded? I wasn’t ready.
How had this happened so quickly? When had baby girl become a kindergarten girl?
Then, Thursday. This morning. I nearly burst out crying multiple times during the morning routine, more so when Hubbie arrived unexpectedly from an impromptu work break, to be there to see his girl off too, on her first day.
She was perfectly fine. She was sooo fine, that she glanced at us as we kissed her goodbye, and then went back to the new toys she had just discovered.
And then we were walking out of the gates and I was sobbing.
I felt lost for about 20minutes. Like I had forgotten something. A part of me was missing.
But then I remembered the things I had been looking forward to. And I realised that this is as much a transition process for me, as it has been for baby girl. She is more skilled than her mother though, as she has already flown through and is at the “let me at prep already Mum” stage.
All in good time.
As mixed as the general feelings were about today, predominantly that of happiness and excitement prevail. And how could they not when I look at this photo?
Baby girl striding forward confidently, not a care in the world, eager to see and learn and experience and feel a world of NEW.
Let me at it guys!
My baby girl, forever. Excuse me as I tear up again…