#1263 Looking for Love

The Bachelor is back on our screens peeps! Winter Wednesdays are on. ❤❤❤

Baby girl saw the tall, dark and handsome enter the screen, and went “Wow!”

Wow, what? I stared at her a moment before she said, still in awe looking at the screen, “all those flowers!”

Oh, ok. That’s better. 😉

Before she could ask me what was going on (with girl after girl set to cross the Bachelor’s path in minutes) I pre-empted with –

“He is looking for love… because he is a grown up. A grown up looking for love.”

(Only slightly hanging on tight to my innocent and naive 5 year old girl?)

And she turned to me then and said –

“I’ve got my love with you and Tato.”

Awww.

I got nothing to worry about… yet. 🌹

 

 

 

#1262 My mini environmentalist

We parked at the local homemaker centre and got out of the car after school.

“Mama look!” She pointed to an empty car spot a few metres away. There was crumpled up packaging on the ground, from one of those Woolies Lion King ooshies that has most kids in a spin.

“Someone opened theirs up and left it there… I’ll throw it in the bin.”

I hesitated. It was on the floor. It was dirty. Who knows what had gone over it.

She hadn’t thrown it there.

I stopped my thoughts in their tracks. Sure she hadn’t been the cause of the litter… but she cared… she was taking action… how dare I even think to dampen her fire, when the intention was so pure, so positive, so genuine?

“Ok,” I replied slowly. “Just don’t touch your face after!”

She picked it up and held it at arms length as we walked over to the nearby store. On our way I spied a bin in the corner and pointed it out to her. As she dropped the empty packaging in the bin she said so proudly, “see, look how beautiful the road is now!”

Awwwww. My heart. ♥♥♥♥

I was so happy. So proud. Kids like her are changing the world, bit by bit. I know many think the state of our future is in crisis… what with an over-emphasis on technology, increasing mental health issues, and overuse of natural world resources among many, many other things…

But the little things make a difference too.

Baby girl is the first to compliment or say well done to a friend who has achieved something.

She tells me it’s important to give to people, as it makes them happy.

And she knows littering is not good… for anyone, especially the Earth.

If all of our kids took little steps like these, no matter how big or small, or many or few, well then the state of our future Mother Earth may be a beautiful one indeed.

 

#1261 Letting it all out

When was the last time you cried?

Let it ALL out?

I don’t mean a pathetic weeping. I am talking a full-fledged, soul-shaking, whole body performance that tremors with the waves of emotions like sea water crashing across the shore.

It’s obviously best done with someone you trust. Someone you love.

Even better perhaps, when you are on the phone.

You can ugly cry all you want. Screw up your eyes and let your snots hang dangerously low, let the teardrops make splatters on your pants, stain your top.

And although the beginning of such a sob session may start off as solemn, downcast, and awfully depressing… something wonderful does come out of it.

Nothing may have changed. Nothing major anyway. Buy you not only gain a different perspective from hearing someone else repeat your words, but you feel somewhat lighter too.

The load has been dispersed. Instead of one huge boulder on your back, the expression of your deepest sadness may have allowed some of that boulder to chip away, and leave instead, large stones.

And the more that you walk along, and on with life, the more likely it is that some of those large stones may slowly start to roll off…

And so on.

Nothing changes overnight… But it is the knowledge of someone lending an ear, while you also let loose, allowing the internal waterfall to pour out, that actually makes all the difference.

#1260 Sipak tea

I had a lovely moment tonight while sipping some herbal tea…

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Sipak tea, that is.

“What the hell is sipak?” you may ask.

Well firstly, it’s pronounced with a ‘sh,’ so” shi-pak” instead of “si-pak.”

And the ‘pak’ is not at all like “pack,” instead like “puck.”

So it is shi-puck.

It’s a rosehip tea. As much as I rely on coffee daily and enjoy it to no end, I am also a firm tea lover. They both have their place, rightly so. I love having a million and one teas in my pantry, regardless of whether I drink them daily, weekly, monthly, or even, yearly.

So when I finished my old sipak tea packet several months ago, I realised with dismay that the local supermarkets just couldn’t cut it.

They had all these non-European brands of ‘rosehip’ tea (eye roll)… and I just wanted to go back to my roots.

My Croatian roots. I wanted to get the bloody Croatian tea with the Cro writing and branding and only drink that one damn it.

SIPAK TEA.

I asked my Mum not long ago to get me some from her local supermarket, as they have a wide and varied selection of European specialty foods…

Today when we visited my parents, 3 packets were waiting for me. 3!

I took out my mug tonight and made myself a cuppa. It’s still rosehip but with added hibiscus flower. I tell you, I never noticed the hibiscus before, either it is new or it was never made prominent on the old packets, but it still tasted the SAME.

And it was only while sipping it that I realised the mug, cherished as it was, had come from my Mum, too.

My Mum giving me a great Mum mug. And now, traditional caj.

Talk about full circle… or should I say, puni krug. 😉

♥♥♥♥

#1259 Tipsy, relaxed and chilled

I’ve been focused and preparing and go-go-go for days now.

Sometimes we get ourselves overly worked up.

I am guilty as charged.

We had some people over tonight who have never visited our place… a little group of them too, not just, like two.

And despite my craziness and the frenzy leading up to it, I discovered the insanity was all for nothing.

The stress. The nerves. The ‘what ifs’ on every possible scenario.

Why do we do this?

I realised early on it was…

ALL GOOD.

And though now I am relaxed, chilled, and yeah, a little affected after a couple glasses of wine, happy the night is over…

I realise with happiness, I was also content during the night.

Don’t wish for it to be over. Enjoy every moment to the full. Don’t live a life of halves, pushing away emotions and experiences.

Live through all of it, entirely with all of your being. Don’t live a half life. Make it FULL.

#1258 Saving Winter orchids

Several weeks ago on a particularly windy and wet Winter’s day, I looked out the window and saw our orchid buds on a long, strong branch… but yet hanging dangerously low.

They looked as if they would bloom very soon. The problem though was the beating they were receiving from the weather, which is why the branch was suddenly drooping to one side, putting strain on its base.

I went outside and tried to lean the branch along the wall of the house. It seemed to work, as it now leaned vertically along the window side… I went into the house happy, and every so often peered out to see how they were doing through the continuing bad weather.

It was as if I knew… the day wasn’t over and once again I saw them hanging to one side. I was worried the base would snap due to the fierce pressure being placed on it, and so again I rushed out.

This time I pushed the heavy pot to an angle. I used the lean of the branch to my advantage, and having pushed the pot far enough, the lean was now against the window… not hanging loose amidst the wild Wintery weather.

From then on in I was able to check on my orchids, with happiness. 🙂

Today I took this picture.

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They are blooming beautifully. I know I adjusted them so, and yet I feel like they are peering in on me, showing off their amazing beauty, leaning in towards the window with that extra effort, glowing ever so much more than what they would have and whispering “thank you” for my efforts.

And I said “you’re welcome.”

What a tremendous gift from Mother Nature. ♥

#1257 The month of the Roar

I honestly had forgotten. It had completely slipped my mind.

Until I saw it was my cousin’s birthday on social media… I hadn’t realised.

Hadn’t realised, the month of the Lion had begun.

ROAR!

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Photo by Jonatan Pie on Unsplash

And not only had I forgotten, but I had failed to remember for a couple of days already…

The sign of the lion started on the 23rd of July.

(Face palm).

How could I forget one of the most exciting times of the year???

I feel things heating up already… take that as you will 😉

#1256 Asleep in my arms

I sat on the couch after work, as Hubbie and I aired some grievances.

Not at each other… but at LIFE.

Baby girl was next to me. She wanted to sit as close to me as possible… then she wanted me to cover her with the throw that was draped around me. Soon we were sharing.

It seemed the more heated the conversation between Hubbie and I got, and the more frustrated we became with our topics, the closer she got to me. Soon she was asking to sit on my lap, and I pulled her on top of my crossed legs, covering us with the throw, as my blood continued to boil.

My anxiety rose. I felt I had to practice some deep breathing. All of my insides felt like they had been twisted up and left to untangle, and yet they weren’t… with every word and utterance I only grew more upset and frazzled, as baby girl hugged me and nuzzled her head into my chest.

I took a deep breath.

“She’s gonna fall asleep,” said Hubbie glancing at her.

“No she’s not,” I said dismissively. We kept talking… and as I held her in my arms, I suddenly realised.

She WAS asleep.

Her breathing was deep and ragged. She was totally stuffed. Two nights of school productions had taken it out of her. Here I was, all tense and crazy and mad, heaving up and down and getting shitty with everything… and meanwhile baby girl had not minded.

Had not minded one bit.

She had come up close, for love, for comfort, for my heartbeat… and had fallen asleep in seconds.

I was forced to think. Be present. Breathe more calmly. Hubbie left the room, and I hugged her back. Breathed her in. Remembered when she was a baby, and used to fall asleep on me sometimes, when we were on the couch… oh that’s right, that very couch.

I started to relax. I realised I had never thought she would fall asleep on me again. She was bigger after all. 5 going on 16 as I sometimes say. And yet here she was, loving me, and giving me exactly what I needed, even though I didn’t realise it at the time.

Time out. A chance to step back. Reassess. Most importantly, appreciate the beautiful moment.

I rested my head on hers for a bit and almost fell asleep myself. My hands lay on her school uniform. Her pony tail coming loose and stretched out in front of me.

And I was happy to just BE, with her. ♥

#1255 Prepared for a glass or two

We weren’t quite prepared last night. It was our first ever attendance at a school production that baby girl was in, after all.

But yesterday we had watched. We had taken it in. And we had observed one very strong theme amongst A LOT of the attendees…

And I’m not just talking the parents. Hell no. I’m talking the dozens and dozens of grandparents who were there to see their grandchildren up on stage…

Even they were in on it.

We realised that they were all…

Boozers.

In kinder terms, they ‘enjoyed a glass.’ Or two. Or even three, or more…

We had arrived right on drop-off time, the time at which the kids could then get themselves ready for the show… but we realised that there were plenty of parents, already drinking their half-glasses, looking very relaxed.

What? This was a true social function? They had gotten babysitters for this, arrived half an hour early and gotten on the booze…

Why I never…

Why didn’t anybody tell us?!?! 😉

So tonight, we were prepared. And we sure as hell deserved it, Hubbie more so, as he carried baby girl about 2 blocks, while we all huddled together under an umbrella as the rain poured down amongst us.

He was protecting her penguin ballet feet from getting sploshed in puddles (father of the year right there 😘)

After we had dropped her off, STRAIGHT WE WENT to line up at the bar, ahem, snack bar.

😉

We ordered… I happened to look back behind me, and the line was growing out of control, weaving through the foyer area… and then I spied a fellow mum from baby girl’s class.

I see you!

(Cheers 🍷🍺)

P.S I enjoyed the show much more tonight 😉😉😉

 

#1254 The first production

Hubbie and I are always telling baby girl she can pick any extra-curricular activity she likes… like sport, or a musical instrument.

But tonight another area of possible interest emerged…

Because tonight, baby girl was a penguin.

She was in her Madagascar school production 🙂

She had no leading role. Cuter though, she was part of a whole swagger of penguins (more like, a waddle) and they were all dressed in black and white, wearing white vests with ties, and orange hats on their head to serve as beaks.

Oh my. How my eyes welled up.

They came on stage twice during the show. We found her amidst the groups, pointed and clapped and cheered. At the end of the show the entire school came onto the stage, and the preps were at the front, youngest as they are…

And guess who was clear and centre in front of us?

Our ♥

I tell you, watching her perform her moves, sing along with the group and make out the actions, looking out into the crowd while beaming happily, my heart actually SUNG.

My eyes welled up so much, I could barely see. Hubbie and I waved at her excitedly. Blew her kisses. Gave her plenty of thumbs up.

And I couldn’t help but be transported to when I was 16. Sure, a tad older than baby girl. But I was in year 10, and remember being part of about 7 acts for our end of school revue.

I remember the buzz clearly. I remember the feeling of excited anticipation as people rushed behind the curtain. It was dark, and it was all happening in a frenzied quiet.

It was magic.

I remember that fondly. Sure I never went into that line of work, but I developed a tremendous amount of respect for those that do, as I got a taste of it myself… I felt what it was like, to be a performer. Where the world is your stage…

I don’t know what the future holds for baby girl. But I do know that she had a great time tonight, and that is as good a start as any to start creating good first-time memories… ♥

(waddle waddle waddle).