#887 The things that she says…

… Makes me feel like we are doing an alright job with her.

Or maybe I give myself, ourselves, too much credit. Maybe it is ALL her. Maybe it is the stage she is at; maybe it’s the understanding that comes with growth; maybe even it’s all her class activities from kinder and swimming that have her responding and speaking with such care, eloquence, and love.

Some examples:

1. “Mama… can me please have teddy bear biscuit?”

When I respond yes, she asks quietly

“Is that good manners?”

Oh darling. Yes yes and MORE yes.

 

2. When we are heading into the shops quickly.

“Now honey, we are only going in and out, THAT’S IT.”

“Ok Mummy, me listen to you all day, I promise.”

 

3. When I am mad and frustrated, she grabs a hold of me.

“Mummy… look at me. Calm down, ok? Everything be alright.”

Oh, it is laughable and oh-so-cute.

 

4. I am driving.

“Oh, that person is driving like a f*&king idiot!”

“Mama don’t say that word. That very bad word!”

 

:):):) Peeps, she is only 4… and she already knows better than me!

 

 

#863 Shark Tank

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I’m surprised its taken me this long to pay a grateful homage to the above TV show. I have only been watching it from the very beginning, season 1 ep 1, and this latest season you will find me reliably sitting on my couch every Tuesday night from 8:45 to 9:45pm, arguing with baby girl that Mama needs her ‘me time,’ and that she can go do whatever the hell she wants.

Parenting at its finest.

But honestly. All I ask is for one uninterrupted hour. I don’t even get that.

Tell her to go to bed you say.

You obviously DON’T have a 4 year-old child.

I do my best anyway, with what I get. And what I get, I L♥VE. I sit on the couch with my tea, all comfy in my pjs, recently-converted Shark Tank watchee Hubbie beside me, in my nicely heated and cosy abode.

Ahhh.

What is it about this show that I love sooo much? Hubbie has asked me this question several times, and I have thought long and hard about the answer, curious myself.

Quite simply, it is fascinating. Watching some of our countries most successful and wealthiest businesspeople, assess the every day person’s entrepreneurial dreams, and determine if they are worthy and valid enough to be given a cash investment… that is exciting stuff.

It is explorative. You see things from a ‘Shark’s’ viewpoint. You will think an idea will surely get the team fighting for a bite of the money pie, but then slowly, all 5 of them turn it down for various reasons, and their individual reasons offer you a window into their very experienced and business-minded world.

I enjoy the journeys presented, I love the banter between the Sharks themselves… but most of all I gain some courage, some inspiration, some insight into both those people coming into the ‘tank’ and laying their ideas and hearts on the line, and also from the Sharks who offer invaluable feedback and insight for each individual.

Maybe I too, see myself in the entrepreneurs.

And maybe I also see myself in future, like a Shark 🙂

 

#845 Words and Action

First, it was the words.

They came from baby girl, as she stood beside me where I was blowing my nose for what seemed like the 17th time in the last 10 minutes. I sighed, my eyes heavy, my nostrils scraping like concrete against the 2ply.

“Mama you OK?”

“No honey, Mama feels crappy.”

“Don’t worry Mama, you’ll feel better tomorrow. It’s ok, you’ll be ok!”

BIG SMILES.

Just how does a 4 year old hold the empathy, support and consideration to console an adult 30 years her senior? Where does this heartfelt sensitivity come from? Despite my nasally conditions I still managed to give her a warm hug as thanks.

The action.

An hour later and Hubbie came home.

As he walked around the corner to find me lying on the couch, so too came baby girl, holding a bunch of flowers.

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I smiled tearfully. My loves were LIFTING me.

And then I realised… well, she has to get it from somewhere, someone, right? 🙂

#837 Kitchen moments

I don’t know what YOU think, and what the general consensus, if any, out there is of me… but this gratitude thing doesn’t always come super-easy.

Sure, I am able to find happiness in smaller things, and that I attribute to being so self-aware. I am aware that outside of our square worlds, there are lost lives; damaged lives; sad lives; sick lives – and so the littlest things, the smallest joy, the slightest thing to put a smile on my face – well that makes me happy.

It isn’t always so easy to find new and novel things though. Come the colder months. The day to day. It all rolls from one to the next – in fact, is there anything discerning from one 24 hours, to the other? Unless you make a concerted effort to find an event to focus on, that’s all your days will amount to… one long 168 hour week.

Monday. Tuesday. Wednesday. Thursday. There’s appointments. Classes. Kinder. Buy groceries. Make lunches. Wash dishes (repeat by a trillion).

The monotony has my mind asking me several times a day… “what will I write about today?”

Think of what to make for dinner.

That’s it.

Dinner time prep.

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I started on dinner tonight. And I found gratitude for a moment of it. A moment that truly represented where I am in my life right now.

Chopping vegies. Baby girl was nearby colouring in, her textas and pencils and crayons spreading out to the greenery that was going to go in the steamer soon.

I had Ricky Martin’s self-titled album on. One of my faves, and yet I haven’t listened to it in yonks. And then, you know that moment, when a song you love, and yet have forgotten about, comes on, and just BLOWS YOUR MIND?

Be Careful (Cuidado Con Mi Corazon) – Ricky Martin and Madonna.

It was never released as a single, but the music and lyrics of this amazing medley by two of my most favourite-st of artists, is just… magical. It’s haunting, romantic and dark, a truly unique collaboration. I started to sing along as I cut my cucumbers, with baby girl in the background telling me about the plot in Beauty and The Beast.

“If I could reach out to you…”

“Mama! Old lady comes to Beast’s house…”

“Yes sweetheart… take your head, in my hands – “

“Me not scared of old lady. Me fine! Old lady make prince into beast!”

“Yes honey… kiss your eyes, sing you to sleep – “

“Why Gaston want to kill Beast?”

Sigh. “Because Gaston is upset that Belle loves the Beast. But Gaston wants to marry Belle. It’s not nice that Gaston wants to hurt the beast… Here’s my heart to keep- “

“Yes, very cheeky.”

“Please be careful…”

I actually found it funny rather than frustrating. And it’s all about perspective and gratitude.

 

 

#835 4 year-old kinder progress

There were a lot of notes I made in my head today. All while watching baby girl.

Firstly, I love it the most when she doesn’t know I am watching her – this is for anything. Whether it’s playing with her toys at home, or playing at kinder, I gain so much by watching her nature and character unfold when she doesn’t know I’m there.

Today I watched her interact with others. As I walked towards the kinder gates, I watched her learn in the yard as she dug in the garden. I watched her run around and bolt from kid to kid, even more excitedly so since there was a visiting choir from a nearby primary school come to show off their talents, and let’s face it, try to gain more enrolments from our kinder kids in the process.

I watched amused, as she put up her hand with few others to volunteer and play some instruments – this is a room of primarily grade 1 to grade 3s – I was impressed. My girl, not intimidated? Wanting to go up there and give it a go?

I watched as she later found a friend, and they wrapped their legs around each other in a hug so that they were swaying back and forth on the swing together. I hung back, smiling, as it reminded me of my own neighbours and I at that age, swinging at our local park.

I watched with OCD-pride, as she found a toy in the sandpit, and promptly took it to its correct location at the dollhouse table.

And then as I was leaving with her for the day, I threw in a casual line to one of the teachers: “How is she going?” We were alone in the foyer. There was no one to distract her from answering.

“She’s excellent.”

Phew. Sure, she paints more than she cuts up bits of paper she said… but that’s a fun thing I’m sure we can work on together 🙂

A day where I was made grateful for my daughter’s  progress. In confidence, in learning, in playing… and in Life.

(This post comes a day late due to technical difficulties posting it from home 😉 )

 

#828 Bath time

Last week at the end of a particularly crappy day, I was sitting at the side of the tub where baby girl bathed, when I had an idea.

She was just there doing what normal 4 year-olds do: splashing about, playing with her toys… turning here; and then suddenly, turning there, quickly like a fish. And as I observed this, her carefree nature and relaxed attitude, the water enveloping her in a warm hug, I realised I needed something.

I needed a bath.

I mean, as a grown women, shower, sure. But bath? How often do we do it?

I can say with certainty I have not had one in years. I can’t even remember the last time I had one, and it definitely hasn’t been in this house…

So tonight…

BATH TIME.

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Can I say ladies – HAVE A BATH.

Get your Hubbie to look after the kids. lock the door. If you don’t have kids, get your partner the hell out of there and make sure he knows this is vital for your wellbeing… and well, if you don’t have kids or a partner… what the hell are you waiting for? You should have a home spa!

It was, absolutely unreal. I locked the door. Lit a candle. Poured some wine. Made sure the water was hot. And let myself sink into relaxation for a good half an hour.

I need to do this at least once a month. The calm and peace that followed me afterwards was crucial in the recovery and growth of my soul.

But a word of warning ladies… watch out if you are combining hot water and red wine…

#dizzyspells #holdontight #ifyouhavelowbloodpressurelikeme

😉

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#794 Family Reading

When baby girl first brought me the book while we were out at the library, and we were waiting for our regular cappuccino and babycino order (with smiley face bikkie) I didn’t think much. She would often browse the shelves and grab any book, judging it PURELY by its cover.

She brought the large hardcover and placed it on the table, smiling. The book was facing her, therefore upside down to me. It wasn’t a book I recognised at all, and I thought to myself, just another to add to the ‘borrowing’ collection. As she opened the first page casually, she said slowly

“That’s Not Mine.”

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I balked. Even from my upside down position of the book, I could see that the title indeed, was that: That’s (Not) Mine. I paused, thoughts flying through my head as I tried to process it all.

Baby girl was 4.

Did she know how to read?

Had she somehow taught herself?

Was she a genius with an extraordinary IQ?

Did I have to start looking up specialist schools from now?

And then, just as quickly, a reasonable thought crossed my mind.

“Honey, do you have this book at kinder?”

“Yes,” she replied still smiling, turning another page.

She then proceeded to read the book to me. Page by page. Sure not every word was exact, and she was going off memory. But I could see she was roughly repeating the story as it was told, and was so happy to share this story, this very simple and funny story about sharing, with me.

It was a joy to watch. Needless to say, we took the book home that day.

We have had it at her bedside ever since. Every night we read it. When the return date was up, she refused to let me take it back, so I had to renew it: I fear I need to find a copy of the book and purchase it before my repeated renewals expire, or else she will go into a frenzy.

It is the simplest premise, and yet so fun and silly for a child to read, hell even parents to read. And she has wanted it read to her, EVERY SINGLE NIGHT.

Or should I say, she wants US to read it with her. What started out as the both of us sharing the two main roles of the book and acting them out, has since progressed to Hubbie listening in, and offering the last and third viewpoint of the book that comes in right at the end.

Without even meaning to, without even planning, or realising what was happening, we have created our own little family tradition.

I realised it tonight as baby girl and I headed into her room. I got into bed with her, and she picked two books, the same two-book combo she has been picking for over a week now: That’s (Not) Mine, and The Very Sleepy Bear. Tonight, knowing that Hubbie wouldn’t be able to join us immediately, I told her we would read the latter first, before moving onto her pride and joy book last.

And so it was…

Baby girl: “Mine!”

Me: “Mine!”

Baby girl: “Mine!”

Me: “Mine!”

Baby girl: “Mine!”

Me: “Mine!”

Baby girl: “Get off, it’s mine!”

Me: “Go away, it’s mine!”

BOTH: “IT’S MINE!”

Baby girl: (“Crash!”)

“I’m sorry.”

Me: “I’m sorry too.”

Baby girl: “Wanna go play?”

Me: “Yeah!”

Hubbie: “… mine!”

♥♥♥