#2009 Feeling the birthday love

I felt truly blessed today.

Another lockdown birthday, and yet the surprises, presents, messages, phone calls, serenades and dedications kept me warm and fuzzy from all winter colds and extended lockdown news, keeping me so busy I could barely keep up all day.

But it was even better, because I celebrated it all, times two.

Baby girl and I share our birthdays on the same day. We did what we could, walked the almost empty streets, ate lunch by the water in our cars, and got some takeaway cake, ice cream and coffee.

It was a super splendid day, and you know what?

At a time when things have felt really super shit, I’ve questioned a lot, felt withdrawn and upset by lots in life… this is what I needed. A day where I really truly, felt the love.

I felt it all, and it was so warm, so caring, so welcoming. I was truly humbled to tears.

I know, no matter what life throws at me, there are people out there who care about me.

And that matters more than anything.

Reach out to those around you, let them know how you feel. You don’t even have to wait for their birthday… you may not know how much they need to hear your beautiful words. 💖💖🙏🙏

#2008 Birthday park fun

Lockdowns in both birthday seasons.

You know what I said today?

STUFF IT.

We took a whole lot of doughnuts to the park today. Baby girl bumped into some school friends. The wind was breezy, but that sun was adamant.

I like when it’s adamant. So was I today.

What was left!

She was a very lucky girl. We spoiled her as much as we could, and it’s not even her birthday yet…

So often in life you gotta make the most of what you’ve got, and so far we’re trying, man we’re trying.

So much pink, LOVE it. 💖💖

#2007 Birthday skies

The skies were beau-ti-ful today.

Turning it on for our birthday month.

And we’ve tried to make it special as much as we can. Takeaway dinner from a yummy local restaurant, after this delish gourmet platter hubbie brought home.

It doesn’t replace the family and friends we miss so much.

But, soon. 🤞❤

#2003 Getting out when it’s hard

This happened last year in lockdown as well.

I went from days when I was all “I am managing, I am surviving, hell I am even a tiny bit killing this ‘work-from-home, home-schooling, balancing all of life while remaining optimistic, hopeful and grateful for the little things in life’ thing.”

And then just as quickly a day would come when I was all ‘I HATE EVERYTHING AND EVERYTHING SUCKS.’

Well that was me today. All of the above.

I’ve been sick, so I of course I woke countless times with blocked nose, runny nose, I was hot, and I just kept tossing and turning, tossing and turning, tossing and turning, tossing and turning.

Then there was the neighbour’s dog. God help me this dog. I have no problems with dogs. I have problems with dogs that do not stop barking EVER. This dog has a routine, which makes me think it’s owner has one where they leave the house for exactly the same time every day… the dog will start barking sometime after 8:30am, and will go on for at least 2 hours, uninterrupted.

UNINTERRUPTED.

When I’m up early and taking baby girl to school, well it’s still noise pollution let’s be frank, but it doesn’t affect my time in the house so much.

This morning though, after a sleepless night, and then finally falling asleep, only to then be woken by said annoying dog?

OMG.

And it stopped, of course, with 10 minutes to spare before I had to wake up and get baby girl ready for a school zoom call. 🤦‍♀️

I woke cranky, tired. My nose alternating between blocked and runny. I saw there were 20 new covid cases today. That made me especially sad, thinking of another lockdown birthday.

Everything was sad, everything was bad. Sad, bad, sad, bad.

But after lunch, I decided I had to snap out of it.

Baby girl and I headed down to the Main Street to grab a takeaway coffee and babycino, some treats, and then walked on down to the park.

It was a tiny bit sunny, mostly blowy, but man that wind knocked some sense into me, you know, ruffled me up and wisened me up in the best way.

Guys, if you’re feeling low, don’t be hard on yourself. This time of our lives is like nothing we have ever experienced, and honestly, just give yourself a change of scenery. Go outside. Take a walk, rug up in a jacket, and breathe.

Something as truly simple as that, might be the key to help you get by, another moment, of another day…

And on and on and on, ’til we come out the other end. 💪

#1998 Making the most of it, always

Breathe in, breathe out.

This was my measured response, after my initial “F$#K!”

The TV had been on the Olympics this afternoon, when all of a sudden the volume changed, and when I glanced towards it there was an extreme close up of Dan Andrews’ face with the banner on the bottom screaming in red, lockdown from tonight.

WHAT?!

My fuelled response was 100% reaction, but after seeing the disappointment start to show on baby girl’s face of yet another week of home-schooling, I quickly changed gear and started giving her positives where I could.

Later tonight Hubbie was saying how our world has changed so much. You just have to go with the flow, constantly.

If we’re out on parole (as he calls it!) then live. Get out of the house, have friends over, go out to dinner.

Then when we’re back in lock-up, well, enjoy that too. The quiet, the chance to catch up on home projects, Netflix, books, all that.

And my gratitude comes from those thoughts… because I realised happily that we’ve always lived like that.

We always make the most of it.

We don’t wait for the right time to have fun. We don’t wait for a special age birthday to throw a big birthday.

We just do, what feels right. We try to make the most of the moment, as much as we can, when we can.

Covid and lockdown and everything that comes with it, has been a metaphor for life really.

Make the most of it, because you don’t know what’s around the corner.

And even though baby girl’s upcoming birthday may not be exactly on the date we wanted, as I told her today –

“IT WILL HAPPEN!”

We just have to allow things to flow more freely, roll with the lockdown punches.

There’s another metaphor too.

It won’t happen how we want it, but it WILL happen. 🤞

#1983 Birthday countdown

Apt title, considering that gratitude number. ⬆⬆⬆😉😉

It’s officially 26 days ’til my birthday.

And it’s one of those things I’m hanging for, looking forward to, at a time where things can change so quickly and all prior plans can be turned upside down.

I’m spent, I’m tired. I’m emotional, and I’m cranky.

I just want something to look forward to. Something I can safely look forward to. We have stuff planned over the next few weeks, and I keep saying to baby girl “now, that’s only if covid doesn’t go nuts again…”

I’m just over it. And I’m quietly hopeful, crossing my fingers, that my birthday, ahem, OUR birthday, will see out some kind of better plan this year.

Please please please. 🙏🙏

#1953 One of my fave Winter days

Today is one of my favourite Winter days.

June 21st.

It sits nicely amongst other fave Winter days, and the unifying theme is all about hope. Hope, and happiness.

So, what are my fave Winter days? I never thought you’d ask.

June 1st is first. There is so much dread and anxiety approaching the coldest season of the year, that honestly having the day tick over to Winter is a RELIEF. The waiting is over, and most of the time, it ain’t that bad.

And also, this year was really not that bad at all. You know what’s bad? Covid, and LOCKDOWNS. But Winter? Nah. Chuck on a jacket and go outside with your freedom.

June 10th. This is my sister’s birthday, and so it comes to reason I love it because she’s one of my favourite people. 💖💖

The end of June is great. We are a month down of Winter! July 15th is a similar reason, in that it’s halfway through Winter, and then end of July, we’re two months done peeps! I consider August HALF-Winter, LOL.

And speaking of August, there is mine and baby girl’s birthdays, including that of everyone I know in my life, pretty much, almost. And I say time and time again, come our birthday, and Spring is in the air, I SWEAR. I will fight this to the end guys.

So, what’s so spesh about June 21st?

Two things, really. Kinda three.

Our engagement anniversary. 13 years ago we had a terrific celebration where our families and friends united for one amazing, joy-filled, hopeful night. Full of happiness, dance, laughter, and great memories.

The second reason is it’s the Winter solstice. The shortest day of the year! So from here on out, the days will incrementally start getting longer, oh-so-small at first but it will be there.

An aside from the Winter solstice is the meaning behind it. Our number three. The spiritual significance of the day has to do with the dark making way for the increasing lighter days, with renewal and rebirth both major themes.

I absolutely love this, and so every year I look forward to it with excitement.

I was lucky in that I had the opportunity to engage in self-care on such a day, a day when your intentions and what you put out into the Universe is paramount. I walked, I worked out. I had coffee, made a warm breakfast. I read, I wrote, I sat in the sun, and I also chilled, like watched TV, so, so peacefully.

It is a day of hope, of promise, and after losing a lot of hope for so long, I am feeling like I am starting, very slowly, to gain it back.

And this winter solstice is therefore so timely. 🌞

#1918 Art will live forever

I was going through old family photos this evening as I searched for photos of my Dad over the years, for his official birthday today.

I don’t know about you, but I get sucked into a time warp when I start doing this. I go through one year, then another, and another… suddenly I’ll look up from what I’m doing and be like “woah. Where am I?”

Like I’ve just woken up or something.

Photos transport you. I love going through them, and I’m trying my damndest to keep all my photo albums documented and in chronological order, though I’m very behind… but still trying.

And in thinking about photos, I realised that their ability to transport you to different times, and with different people, make them invincible.

They defy time and space.

They live forever.

It immediately made me think of words. Words live forever too. Think of the words you read by a poet 200 years ago… they breathe new life when you quietly repeat them in your mind, the meaning travelling through centuries to make its way to you.

And music. I LOVE music. Think of all the songs you love, from singers and bands that have long now gone, the words and the melodies that you continue to belt out in your car, when you’re doing the dishes, or in the shower… their lyrics and the music continue to live on through you, when you press play on your device, or decide to go acapella, wherever.

Art. Art is what it is. I love art, creativity, in all its forms.

Part of the reason is, IT CAN NEVER DIE. People, words, songs, they will always be revived when they are recalled, read, played.

Of course, they are passionate expressions of creativity, and that is simply the most beautiful thing. Even photography, it captures a moment in time, something that nothing else can quite do, and helps you to recall sudden scents, sights, a dress you used to wear when you were young, or a place you used to visit, and no longer do…

Photos can do all of this, and it was this I was reminded of when passing through the many years of my Dad’s life tonight.

They remind us of all the times of our life, when our own memories fail us.

How many other wonderful things will be captured by photo, that we are yet to live?

How many beautiful words are we yet to read?

And what magical music are we yet to hear?

Beautiful food for thought. 💖💖

Photo by Lisa on Pexels.com

#1917 A special birthday

Check out the numbers on those cakes:

8-0. 80.

Yes. We celebrated my Dad’s birthday today, a day earlier from his actual birthday.

Wow. What a milestone. It’s what I wrote in the card too. Just think about it… all the things you must go through, pass through, live through, to get to that grand age…

I was feeling grateful and fulfilled that we were together today, able to celebrate as family should.

And though life can be hard, and IS hard, and there are moments where you can see more hardship than good, these are the moments you ultimately live for.

The togetherness. The laughter. The love. The food, the drink, the memories, and the D&Ms through all crazy hours…

These are the moments where you thank God/your lucky stars/Karma/yourself, for where you are in life, and who you are with.

And to celebrate my Dad’s birthday today, was the ultimate icing on the cake. LITERALLY.

Happy birthday Dad. We love you. 💖💖💖💖

#1867 Out us two

Hubbie and I haven’t been out somewhere, the two of us, AT NIGHT, for, ohhhh…

Maybe over 3 years? The last time I can remember, it was The Weeknd concert, and that had followed the Sia concert the week before, so we had scored two ‘us time’ weekends out in a row…

But then a massive 3 YEAR GAP.

We had a birthday tonight, and it was so great to catch up with great friends, reminisce, talk about the future, and have a couple of drinks.

A couple. Specifically, 2.

There was a bit of a yellow glow to it all… due to the yellow lamps hanging everywhere…

Or, maybe it was us.

GLOWING in excitement at being out. 😁😁