#1214 The cycle of work and life

In this last month or so at work, we wait with nervous anticipation at the sole mercy and direction of management, as to when it will be our last day.

EVER.

Our job responsibilities have started migrating interstate – people will be starting to do our job, over there, in a number of days.

The countdown is on.

And today a work colleague observed something. She commented how our workload was reducing slowly, and in no time it would be the very small workload we used to have back in the day, when we first walked through those doors, many years ago.

A small workload, minuscule, compared to our job today. Weirdly, we observed that as we are nearing the end of our work days, we are coming full circle.

It isn’t just the workload though. I realised that not only were we going back in time with how much (or should I say, how little) we were meant to be doing… but we were also going back about a decade, to the same group of people.

Because those who had come after me, were already gone. Going. They had taken early leave… found another job… or left conveniently right when all of this craziness began.

Leaving me, and the original crew.
Those who were there when I arrived. Those who came shortly after. Those who were in other departments, but ended up joining ours over time.

It was going back, to the good ol’ days.

And although I share some special friendships with those who have already left… there is something nostalgic about walking out of those doors for the last time, alongside those you walked in with.

I know, it will be hard.

I say that I can’t wait to turn my back on the Docklands Winter and never have to work within its windy grasp again… but on that last shift, I will pause, and look at the water shimmering amidst boats in the morning dawn, and reflect.

I know I can’t wait to never have to set my alarm again for the insane hour of 5am… but come Wednesdays, and I’ll be wondering where all my colleagues are.

And I know I can’t wait to move on, and go onto bigger and better things… because I know they are waiting for me…

But it’ll be terribly bittersweet. I have been there for over 11 years. About a third of my life. And the friendships I’ve made, the drunk stories from Christmas parties I can tell, the gossip I’ve been privy to, the big news items I broke, the laughter, emails, in-jokes, work lingo, industry speak, insider knowledge, hour long d&ms, and the 45,721 coffee runs I’ve walked…

I know I will cry. People might put on a show and act like they don’t care.
But I do. The people and the memories will be with me always.

And so, it makes sense that at the end of the production line, we are slowly heading back, to day 1.

And with all that said… I don’t mind if they drag this out, just a little longer.

I will stay. I will wait.

#1169 Philosophy and the Drive Home

Another drive home from being out, and another philosophical D&M.

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Photo by Luigi Manga on Unsplash

The ingredients for this baked matter that seems to happen almost on a weekly basis now?

A dash of a day of drinking

A heavy sprinkle of a long drive home

And almost a necessity, 1 full cup of a sleeping baby girl in the back seat.

“Imagine Mister F.” Hubbie is giving me an example on his latest ‘thing.’

“Mister F is so scared when he hears our heavy footsteps around the house, or we close a door suddenly… imagine what he went through before coming to us to feel and act like that.”

He goes on. “Now imagine I hold that against him. I hold that weakness, that insecurity against him. I should be helping him! Reassuring him. It’s not his fault.”

I pause. “Yeah but Mister F is not attacking me is he? It’s a lot easier to help someone that is scared and isn’t out to get you… but take someone who is having a go at you, and how likely are you to want to help them out of love and care? How easy is it then?”

Clearly, we are not in Kansas anymore Toto, just as we clearly are not solely talking about our cat’s fear of our footsteps.

We are talking about something else entirely.

And in this scenario…. he is being the peacekeeper. The lover. The diffuser.

And meanwhile, I am being the fighter. Throwing Karma back in people’s faces. Going all “GRRR, ARGH!”

We are on polar opposites of this discussion.

As we drive, it literally feels like I am ripping my hair out. It drives me insane that we are on these opposite ends, and still, I understand where he is coming from, I see the peace inherent in adopting such an attitude…

I just can’t get there, myself, personally… YET.

Because I want to, just as much as I don’t want to, and this is where the battle lies. The battle with making people pay, making them hurt as much as they have hurt you… yeah sure, very ‘un-gratitude like’ for me, but some people just push my buttons, and unfortunately I can’t just press a special red button and expel them from the earth’s atmosphere. So yeah. That’s me in a really RAW nutshell.

But I listen to him. I imagine the scenarios. And though it shits me to no end, I still enjoy these talks. These debates. These to’s, and fro’s.

These talks that make us open our eyes, better ourselves, and want something more.

All when we are driving home in the car. Who said long drives were boring?

In an aside… what do YOU think?

Can you see yourself helping someone who has hindered you and hurt you? Who has failed to say sorry?

Can you move past that, forget it all, and treat them, well? With no recognition of the hurt that has passed?

Even if you feel the respect they owe to you, is all but gone?

Can you be the first to reach out and help them, when they were the first with the right-hand blow?

Could you???

 

 

#1098 Simple but best burgers

The highlight of tonight came as we were all crowded around some home-made burgers.

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And it wasn’t the burgers alone that made the night great, but what those burgers represented.

Great company with family friends we haven’t caught up with in a long while.

Great conversation – the type where there are two lines of dialogue running at the same time.

And last but not least… 4 gorgeous kiddos munching at a mini table beside us, happily devouring their burgers…  baby girl one of them. 😍

The burgers were simple, good. Wholesome, healthy, tasty.

Some of the best things in life are simple, right?

And if simple equates to the best…

Well then the kids playing, our d&ms and these gourmet burgers made this night tops 👍

#1084 Bra-less

Ohhh, it’s not what you think.

Rather it was coming home from work… getting changed into lighter clothing (do you know how cold it is at 5:30 in the morning?) and then later going… “hmmm…. I need to go even lighter.”

Put on that dress that is reserved only for home it is that baggy and old… but wait, one more thing.

Rip off the bra.

Ahhh.

It wasn’t just the removal of clothing uninhibiting my skin. It was the words that came out of me. The thoughts, feelings and emotions, fears and stresses, worries and anxieties that sprung forth once the straps were off. Once the back was unclipped. Once the material was peeled off of the skin.

So too did the negativity come undone.

And I felt freer than I ever felt. Just by removing my bra 😉

#1051 A grateful start to 2019

What more can I ask for?

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Photo by Oskars Sylwan on Unsplash

Seeing in the New Year with family, friends.

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Love, happiness, fun, laughter.

Dancing and d&m’s.

Roasted marshmallows.

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Splashing by the pool.

Selfies by the tree.

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All the good things, are all the simple things.

Happy New Year to all. May 2019 bring you all your greatest desires.

Every year with my loved ones, I am supremely grateful.

Here’s looking to a 2019 filled with more gratitude, or ways to find it, than the last.

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Photo by NordWood Themes on Unsplash

#1035 The KK Christmas carol

I’m going to sound like a broken record, but… why don’t we do this more often?

EVERY TIME I leave from a catch-up with my high school girls, it’s this recurring thought. It’s worthy of a looney tunes-style mallet to beat myself over the head with.

But alas, it’s not just me. It’s life that keeps me busy, as well as the lives of the 4 other girls from that table tonight.

Yes, events, people, partners, kids, work, families keep us ALL so, so busy…

But when we catch up…

WHEN we catch up…

It’s laughter. It’s light.

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It’s meaningful and sincere.

It’s hilarious and witty.

It’s tales about food intolerances interspersed with OCD husbands telling us to park next to poles.

It’s slap-the-table-down with laughter in amongst solemn nodding and deliberation.

It’s making plans for the future, and then reminiscing about that time in the year 2000, when… ❤️😊😂

So tell me again, why we wait so long for nights like these?

 

I feel a rhyme coming on… BRACE YOURSELVES.

The 12 Days of Christmas KK Countdown

On the 12 days of Christmas, my true friends gave to me

12 types of gyoza 

11 sneaky selfies

10 different entrees

9 “OMG”s

8 random flashbacks

7 lots of wrapping

6 potato croquettes

5 CRAZY CHICKS!

4 sweet plum wines,

3 Japanese waiters

2 types of ice cream

And the best KK of 2018!

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😆😂🎄

Damn it I’m tacky.

 

#890 The best Sisters day

I say the above confidently, and strongly, because although today was the absolute BEST, I know in my heart our share of BEST days will only get better and better as the times and the years roll on.

I am talking about times shared with my Sister.

Every time we do them, we always say they are long overdue. And they are – what with life and responsibilities, tasks and chores, Hubbies and kids, we always feel like finding time for ourselves, comes last.

But with the kids getting older, we are trying to become wiser.

By putting ourselves first. (Not always, or else the earth may tilt on its axis. No, we can only be selfish every once in a while 😉 ).

Because when we fill up our own energy and enthusiasm, zest for life and happiness restores, then we become better wives, mothers, friends, colleagues, and confidantes.

And who better to fill up your reserves with, than your Sister?

It started off with coffee, as all great days do…

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And then we headed over to Mornington Pier on what was a tremendously windy and cold July day, to ‘freshen up’ our senses and REALLY FEEL ALIVE, before indulging in a comforting and decadent lunch.

 

 

Those views. Just because you need some more…

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But it wasn’t the food or drink or dessert that made today amazing. Nor was it the savagely beautiful waves crashing against the pier, in amidst the stormy and temperamental ocean backdrop. No, it was simply, the company. Having someone to talk to, share your deepest secrets and desires and thoughts with, retelling happy occasions and past laughs, getting all deep and meaningful and just talking about all aspects of life… well that was the best part of the day. That was the soul nourishing bit. This is the type of stuff you live for. These are the connections you are meant to make.

These are the most important people in your life.

Which is why every day I spend with my sister, is the BEST day ever. ALWAYS ♥♥♥