#1180 Watching the world go by

I helped out in baby girl’s class this morning.

2 HOURS. Even with them singing out “Good morning SmikG” (!) making any teacher dreams I ever had come true, I still required a… something… anything… time out to pat myself on the back on this hellish say that was considered, May.

Stupid Melbourne weather.

I headed through not-very-Autumn-like winds and shivering temperatures to…

Via Boffe. We are living there lately.

I ordered a warming chai latte… the herbs darling, NOT the powder… a protein ball…

And I sat by the window.

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Yep. I was one of those people. The ones you spy through café windows, looking back at you all haughty and dream-like as they sip their beverages and you walk by in a rush, wishing you were in there instead.

I was that person.

I loved it. Just as nice as it is to do something for others, as I had done this morning…

So too is it good to do something, for ME.

#1170 School helper

Today I got my green sticker on.

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I was a parent helper at baby girl’s school.

I thought it was timely when some weeks ago we were asked via newsletter if any parents could volunteer their time to help out our kiddies class, once or twice a week.

I thought it was the perfect opportunity. With working finishing up soon, and being at such an impressionable age of prep, I felt it was important to baby girl that I show up… more than just at drop-off and pick-up.

And hey, it is a luxury at the moment, right? I might find myself doing something in a few months time where I can’t volunteer any free time to helping out, and then I’ll be bemoaning it and thinking back to that time we were in the Hall and I was telling the kids to keep their feet together while they jump…

🙂

Which was today. It was great to be there and look out for her, as well as be a part of school ‘things’ and watch how they learn and progress. I enjoyed the community aspect, and valued the time I was able to almost, be a fly on the wall.

So, I will help as long as I can. ♥

#1164 Sisters hit Sassafras

Today was well overdue.

ALL the best days are.

Best outings. Best catch-ups. Best times with the best people.

Sis and I caught-up and headed into the Dandenong Ranges for coffee, food, and then more food…

But more important than anything we consumed, was the talking. The open-heartedness. The breaking down of walls. The happiness in sharing your thoughts with someone, speaking openly and honestly and knowing there is no judgment, only love and hope for better things.

We hide things too often. We keep our woes close to our chests and in turn they burden our bodies. We carry these physical and mental stones, struggling in an uphill battle that sees us growing weaker and weaker, the further we climb with these massive boulders…

And then we fall, rolling spectacularly down the hill.

But then, there will be a hand. A hand outstretched to lift you up, help you out, and see to it that you will be on your way again.

With no stones. Just a hand to hold.

The hand I held today was my sister’s. ♥

#1143 Making and Baking

Today on her Pupil Free Day…

where baby girl was at home with me, rather than at school…

She found herself making

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And baking

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What a great opportunity today was to start on the Easter hat she will don for the parade at the end of term this Friday. It was a leisurely actively both chosen and imposed, for I have realised the sarcasm evident from the mouths of parents when they jokingly show overwhelming disdain for yet another project they have to help their child with.

Sure she decorated most of it, I helped with the fiddly bits of course… and it’s the fiddly bits that are the worst. I attached the strips to the bonnet the wrong way and it was showing up white, instead of green…

(Face palm).

PEEL OFF. Again we start.

We got there, in the end. And she was so super pleased with herself, she did her own little impromptu hat parade around the house.

And then of course, there were the scones.

I don’t know if it’s just unlucky coincidence that last time we made scones she was also sick. I don’t know if that means the act of planning to make scones make her sick (as I had planned on scones for today from last week) or if in fact I somehow predict on a subconscious level she is going to be sick, and therefore wish to protect ourselves from the fact by baking something homely and comforting to combat the unwelcome cold.

Nevertheless, the jam and cream upon pillow-y pieces of goodness made her happy. She lavished the spreads on generously, and if anything, the scones and hat made her forget she was sick… she was really only having, a well-timed day off.

#1128 Un-asked dish washing

Today, as I held my head in my hands, grappling with not just a thumping headache but sorrowful emotions from the day, Hubbie took his empty dinner plate to the kitchen while baby girl and I had our last bites.

Running water. Clinking of dishes. The opening and closing of the rubbish bin.

It was unmistakable. He was doing the dishes.

My Hubbie. A helper, but also a ‘hater-of-dishes’ kind of helper.

Still he got up.

Unasked.

No fanfare.

With simple action, practically in the background, he got up and got to it.

And I suddenly loved him ALL THE MORE. 😍😍😍❤️❤️❤️🙏🙏🙏🍽🥣🥄🍴

#989 The f*&king application

I sat at my desk today, trying to write.

Here is my desk:

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Hold on. Let’s take a closer look, shall we…

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Yep. It was that kind of day.

I had held off on a to-do list item for a while now. And it wasn’t just ANY to-do list item. It was a writing one, one that involved applying for a writing course that I was hoping to put concerted effort into if approved – not only because it was a long-held passion of mine, but because I had to find something to do next year when my 11-year job came to a halt.

In applying for this course, I had to write a cover letter detailing the stage and progress of my novel, as well as include 1500 words of prose.

But, what would I write?

“Uh, so I wrote this book, about 20,000 words too long. And then I sent it out to agents with no luck, so I kept re-writing, and then I got it down (slightly), but then by that stage I had a baby.

I totally went off the ‘pitching book to agent phase’ because you know, said BABY and all, and then found another avenue to express my love of writing – in blogging.

And you know blogging is sooo much easier. No one is there correcting my work or telling me I can’t get published. I write what I like, and when I hit post, the whole world gets to see what I’ve written, whether they like it or not, think it is smart or not, and whether they agree with me or not.

But I really need to get my head out of the sand and start doing something with my novel, hence why I am here. SO. PLEASE. HELP. Accept me into this course before I start yet another blog.”

Or, something like that. Like, how could I actually put into words the last 6 years of my writing life?

I did my damn best. I put something together, I was honest, I added the words “cringe” (because I really was cringing as I put it all together) and prayed that it would be received well.

How horrible would it be to actually be rejected for a writing course? Like can you imagine… you want to pay someone a considerable amount of money to teach you stuff, and they go “no sorry, we don’t want you to pay us.”

Shudder.

To their benefit, the programme wants to make sure that the level you are writing at is best suited to their course, or else they can suggest something else for you. They don’t want to waste your money, which is actually admirable.

Still, I need help. And today I was so glad and grateful that I finally got around to writing those few pesky letters and emails I was putting off for so long, because I couldn’t actually put down in words, what I had been doing with words, all these years.

But I got there… and I hope that I actually, get there.

#953 The best part of Google

‘Google is greash.’ I actually have that tag floating around on this blog, and I use it often.

And yes, I am dedicating today’s gratitude to it. When you get to the bottom, you will understand why.

Because it is not a frivolous or materialistic thing. Sure you can find things online, buy them and have them delivered to your door… but that is not what I am grateful for.

Sure you can search for the lyrics to your latest fave song, and be singing along to it within minutes of finding it… but that is not what I am grateful for.

Sure you can turn to it in times of wordly need, and search for the synonyms of breakable, just as you can look for the antonym of exhilaration… but that is not what I am grateful for.

Sure you can look up your city’s weather in 2 weeks time, and try to determine if you will need to re-think picnic plans for that weekend… but that is not what I am grateful for.

Sure you can search for the most uncommon, weirdest and rarest object (try the image of the cat in water saying “I’ll F&*k you right up,” a round rug no bigger than 2 metres diameter in various shades of blue, and silver 1970s Pontiac wheel trims  – that one is on Hubbie), and it will still give you some kind of info, even including where to get it…

But that is not what I am grateful for.

Instead I am grateful for this: I am grateful to Google, because as much as you can find the most obscenely tedious and trivial things on it, so too can it help you mend your heart.

You can find online forums and support groups of people who are going through the same thing you are.

You can speak anonymously, when in real life you can’t speak up at all.

You can feel comforted by the fact that you are not alone, and there are in fact hundreds if not thousands of others like you that have gone through, and are going through the very same thing.

You can feel a little less lonely, a little more connected, and happy in the fact that there are others who can help.

In this regard, Google excels.

So today, Google… I thank you. ♥

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