#654 Mills Beach Love… and the ‘true story’ behind the photos

There is a whole other side to the sweet, loving and idyllic photos that people post so often on social media.

And that definitely includes MINE.

I generally do post more happy stuff… I used to sometimes rant about something that might annoy me, and only after reading other rants on facebook, did I realise it was really unnecessary, and negative-drawing. I didn’t really feel much better about myself, my life, or that person when I read such quotes, and it made me realise that stuff like that was not needed online.

Not to confuse a day-to-day ‘I’m so pissed at the traffic today’ rant with a serious issue that needs attention and addressing. No that is fine, pull ALL the support and help from ALL the social media outlets, and gather the troops around as much as you need with your furious words. We need your PASSION.

So, I do post occasionally about our day-to-day lives, more so when we are doing something fun – I mean, does anyone wanna see us sitting on the couch in our pjs eating breakfast and watching Shimmer and Shine? Yeah I thought not.

shimmer and shine

But the story behind the photo often runs so much deeper, it travels something like an episode of Mr. Bean, it can be that frustratingly hilarious and stupid.

Take TODAY. Perfect example.

It was hot, and we went to the beach. I posted a photo of Hubbie and baby girl… for certain reasons I will not repeat that photo here, but instead here is another:

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You get my drift. Relaxation, fun in the sun, blue waters, chilling in the shade as I watch my family in the water…

Good times…

??? Or not?

Here is the REAL story. Because yes I am grateful we went to one of our favourite beaches today as a family on one of our few days off together, but seriously… we were ALL nearly crying at various stages.

Firstly, we got there late. 3:30pm, and this was after we stopped at Baker’s for some bread rolls, and Hubbie got a cheap knife from Woolies (more on that later) because he had forgotten to bring one from home, and then because he had a couple of beers for himself, he was ever so kind, through the 30+ degree heat of the day, to head over to the nearby Dan Murphy’s to get me some kind of mixed drink.

Hubbie and I hadn’t had lunch. Baby girl was the only fed one.

Arriving at the hottest time of the day with several bags, 3 beach chairs, a folded up tent, towels, and walking about in the hot sand when we were hungry and starving, is trying enough.

But we did it. We set up the tent, almost stuffing it up (but we made it!) and then I just launched into the water where baby girl was already playing, sitting down immediately it was that bloody beautifully warm.

So, all good. I headed back to the tent where Hubbie was getting some stuff ready, applying sunscreen for himself, etc etc… I went to get the drink Hubbie got for me.

Rekorderlig is not paying me but I won’t say no if they come knocking. 

So I found this cider and I was like “yes!” as it’s been ages since I had one. I went to open it up, looking at him questioningly as I said “screw top?”

“Yeah,” he replied casually, at the same time looking over to the bottle in my hand and his face dropping. Because he just realised that it is in fact NOT a screw top, and it required a bottle opener.

Damn.

I sighed. I hadn’t eaten, Hubbie was getting crankier by the second, I could just feel the waves of irritation blowing off of him, and now we had no opener.

I wanted a bloody drink.

“We have one in the car,” he said, and I relaxed somewhat.

The way I am obsessed about tissue boxes being in every part of the house, scissors and nail clippers and nail filers being both upstairs and downstairs, he is a total fuss-pot and needs to have bottle openers scattered everywhere, house, car and probably his pants, because, IN CASE.

“Can you put some sunscreen on my back?” I asked him.

He raised his eyebrows. “Is that before or after you want me to get the bottle opener and make your lunch?”

I ignored him and smiled. “Yes now.” But we were already getting to that point.

So he went and got the bottle opener. I had a drink, and took the above photo. Fine. I joined him and baby girl in the shallow waters, and we splashed about. Also good. And then he went back to the tent to make my lunch.

Now, I didn’t tell him to make my lunch. We had previously decided on grabbing some of those spinach and cheese/pizza rolls at Baker’s as it was a quick and easy bite especially when we were at the beach. I would have made a pasta salad and brought it with us if our stove was connected – our house and kitchen area is still a mess. So this is what I was thinking, this is what we even said out loud to each other… but then this dude of mine, somehow decided that it would be easier, to buy plain rolls at Baker’s, and then fill them… himself…

You know what he brought with him? Tuna, feta, and tomato. On a 34 degree day amidst SAND.

MORE on that debacle later.

Meanwhile, baby girl and I were in the water. It was amazing, and we were having a ball. I kept asking her, “do you have to go pee?” because I was just getting this vibe off her, I know her so well. She was saying no, so I would let the topic go, but then she’d pipe up “I don’t have to go pee.”

When she says she doesn’t have to go pee, I KNOW she HAS to go and pee.

I finally convinced her to go and pee before coming back. “I promise honey, we are coming back, I wouldn’t lie to you.” She took my hand and off we went.

Now, this is a purely female thing, and I say this because I told Hubbie and he had no idea… but after being in the water for a bit, when us chicks have to pee later, sometimes the urine comes out warm. I know, I’m sorry, using words like URINE and all, bad enough I’m saying PEE. I think it has something to do with our nether-regions being all cold, and our urine isn’t actually warm, it’s our parts that our cold, therefore our urine feels warm.

Enough explanation, if anyone actually knows, please advise in the comments below.

I sat baby girl on the toilet seat, and waited. She immediately yelled “ouch!” and started to whinge/cry. I ascertained that it was her pee, as she has reacted a bit like that before, but not so strongly. I was telling her, comforting her and saying “it’s just a bit warm, everything is ok, it’s not that bad,” but then she suddenly wasn’t peeing – she was holding on – and I was getting worried/upset. Worried because it is not good to hold in your pee (being a Mum shit like this scares you as kids can easily develop infections) but also upset because it is NOT THAT BAD AND SHE IS BEING A DRAMA QUEEN.

For at least 5 minutes I stayed with her in the loo as she got upset at not peeing/holding it in. I tried to console her, then I played bad cop and was like “we’ll go home if you don’t go toilet, you have to go!” But she was STILL upset and said “go home.”

Go home? This girl LOVES the water! Something must not have been right if she was happy to go home.

I got her out of there, REALLY mad. I stomped/limped across the hot sand, baby girl limping too behind me, as we got to Hubbie…

slaving away in the tent.

“I am not happy!” I told him, proceeding to go on about how she wouldn’t ‘go,’ but she had to ‘go,’ but she was holding it in. I told him that we were going home. You know… reverse psychology?

And he went “yeah let’s go… it’s been a shit day.”

?!?!

He continued. “I’m never doing this again!” He had his newly-bought $3 knife, wrappers, a plastic bag as a rubbish bin, food and tins and all kinds of crumbs all around him, and he was SWEATING. “I’m here making YOUR sandwich, it’s a mess, I’m hot, it’s at least 10 degrees hotter in this tent…”

Meanwhile, I was trying SO damn hard to keep my cool. I ended up convincing baby girl to try and pee in the grass behind the beach boxes, as maybe the novelty would help her relax.

Nope. Instead I ended up with something that resembled a small leech on my leg that wouldn’t come off until I scratched it off, and off we went back to the tent, MORE MAD/SAD.

I pretty much ordered her to stay in there, and not move until she went to the loo first. She resigned herself to this, and I sat down to eat this God-damn roll Hubbie had prepared for me, as he sooked and moaned. He pushed the side of the tent away from him as a sudden strong breeze blew the tent wall against him, swearing loudly, and a nearby girl looked over at us as she heard it.

We are European-descendants people. We don’t swear/argue in public. How EMBARRASSMENT. I unleashed.

“Can you fix your f*&king attitude? Honestly all day today, can you just look at yourself? Did I ask you to make me a bloody sandwich, NO, I don’t know what is wrong with you, who brings tuna and feta and a tomato they have to cut at the beach?! There is sand everywhere!”

Like, what the actual fuck.

He went quiet, as I went quiet, chomping on this odd combo of tuna/feta/tomato that somehow worked in a seriously strange way which I would NEVER TELL HIM, picking out the chilli piece in the tuna that he FORGOT TO REMOVE.

Baby girl chomped on a bread roll, Hubbie just sat, and in a few minutes I was back in the water, trying to make her all jelly that she wasn’t allowed to go in. Mean parental tactics maybe, but I was trying to prevent an infection damn it!

In the end, this stubborn girl (wonder where she gets that from?) won. Hubbie ‘let’ her come down to the water, and though I contested it at first, I let it go.

Just like Elsa. LET IT GO.

frozen-let-it-go-photo

 

Which leads me to this next pic.

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Don’t they look serene? Isn’t the water just so sparkling and magical? Oh the joy to go to the beach with your family? Oh, WHAT LOVE! ♥♥

?!?!

You see? You see the shit we had to go through? Hubbie swearing against the tent, the beach, the weather, the sand, about ALL MANNER OF SHIT, baby girl refusing to take a shit or anything else for that matter, and then me, trying to hold the insanity together, and trying so damn hard to ‘think positive.’

:):):)

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Not f*&king easy! :):):)

Yes, we did end up having a really great day, eventually… we were kind of like an overseas commercial at one stage, the one promoting the family having an awesome time on a beach getaway as they all go crazy splashing each other and laughing like mad. We were so Hawaii.  But don’t get too jelly, because when we got home, we were tired and cranky, ate dinner late, Hubbie was a yo-yo as his mood swung from relieved to cranky to funny to shitty, and I was there like

“WTF?”

Both my babes are sleeping now so I love them sooo much. But before.

Before…

Just a reminder that not all things are as they appear in the photos. I still love Mills Beach. I loved our day together. But I think I could have done without the Mr. Bean dramas…

And closure for those keeping score. I realised once we were much happier later on in the afternoon that there is an opening at the back of the tent that can be zipped open, allowing cool air to waft through, keeping it at the same temp as outside. Hear that Hubbie?

And baby girl held her pee in until she got home… and then went normally.

So I actually don’t know what was wrong earlier, or what in fact happened. Much like ALL OF MOTHERHOOD.

 

 

 

 

 

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#640 Saved by the Family

“I’m f^&ked,” I wrote to Hubbie from work this morning. “Heads up.”

He knew what that meant. That meant I was going to come home later in the day, plonk myself on the couch, and moan about how much pain I was in.

And I did exactly that.

Baby girl assisted by sitting really close to me and telling me I was her best friend in the whole world, cradling my face from time to time, and saying every so often “yay, Mama home.”

Hubbie helped by cooking dinner and doing ALL the washing up.

Both HUGE things. I mean, love, attention, food and home maintenance… I should get sick more often, yeah?

NO. Most definitely, no.

Back to normal tomorrow please.

But it is nice to know, my loved ones have my back. ♥

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Photo by Daria Nepriakhina on Unsplash

 

#585 Sunnies season

We’re back, bitches.

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Yep. My old faves, the Dolce & Gabbana sunnies ARE BACK. I usually put them in hibernation sometime around June, to hide away in a drawer somewhere, at the first nasty sign of freezing weather, yet still whispering to them encouragingly “never mind my dears, soon.”

Yep. Soon. Well, kind of soon. 3 months. And today as I took these beauties out, my eyes suddenly relaxing against the squinty sunlight, it was all… “ahhhh.”

Ahhhh.

Because the Spring change is most certainly here. And with it, some much needed Spring sunshine…

#537 New ducted heating!

YEEEEAAAAAASSSSSS!!!

Baby girl is walking around rosy-cheeked again.

The new ducted heating is here.

:):):)

The pain is OVER. We have gone all high-tech and with the times with this beauty

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It regulates temperature, and even has programmable timeslots so that you can have the heater come on at a pre-determined time… un-fucking-believable.

Just like when my new car had a 6 stack CD player, I am soooo behind in the times.

Our old heater, both here and at our old place, was some 80s-90s contraption, where you had to pull the lever across to the desired temperature of 20+ ‘something,’ but even that ‘set temperature’ was questionable at times.

Tonight, it got hot. Like really hot. This is right on time, since my Dad told me the weekend ahead is set to expect some major Winter-y blasts.

And just for the record, when I was freezing my ass off in the house yesterday as the tradies were in the midst of installing new said-heater? Yeah, well, coldest August day for DECADES.

Still, the icy blasts that will set upon us are timely, since we now have heating, bitches. Take that Winter, mwa ha ha.

So toasty and grateful right now 🙂

 

 

#514 Finding a F*&k-up on the Fly

I will be quick. I am literally, still, in the midst of said F*&k-up.

But tonight I am glad that quite incidentally, I happened upon an error whilst at work. It’s not a “YOU ARE FIRED!” Donald Trump from The Apprentice style screw-up, yet nevertheless it is still something that was overlooked (or should I say, failed to be looked at), and should not be there.

Of course it is not my fault. Yet I am hiding my behind, and making space between me and it, by scurrying around and trying my damn-dest to mend it.

So I am glad I found it. I am saving face.

Onwards now. Time is of the essence…

 

#512 Bullshit stories to feed to your child…

…or as some like to call them, little white lies.

Up until a little earlier, I had no inspirational, sunshine-y, happy-go-lucky or renewed vigour for life post to mention here in this little gratitude blog of mine.

But then, as all the other nights before it, the bedtime routine happened.

And as I stood there, counting slowly, breathing deeply, and making occasional bribes to baby girl that all her toys would be gone in the morning, in between warning her that my angry face was going to turn on soon, something suddenly occurred to me.

Just like the sun rising from the dark horizon to fill the world with light, so too did an incredible thought emerge from my fury, giving me Hope that I could remove myself from this shithole.

A bullshit story.

I’ve mentioned this here before. You know, those stories we as parents tell our kids, to get, I don’t know, anywhere?

To get them to listen.

To get them to comply.

To stop them crying.

To shop them whinging.

To distract them.

Hell, to make life easier.

“We have to leave the beach now, because it closes at lunch time. It actually closes.”

“Yes the park is also closing for lunch, everyone is going home to eat.”

“You can’t leave the house without brushing your teeth. The shop people won’t let you buy a kinder egg if your teeth are yucky.”

“Paw Patrol will wait until you’ve had a nap, and then they will come on TV.”

“You have to wear a jacket on the trampoline (in 11 degree weather). It’s the Rule.”

And we get away with it because we can.

Why do we do it? Well as you can see from the above list, sometimes it’s for their sake – cleanliness or health. Sometimes it’s for convenience.

Sometimes it’s for OUR sanity.

And tonight once again it was the latter. Because for some reason, baby girl’s room was too dark. In amidst stalling with a variety of ways to not sleep, she kept pulling this nifty excuse out of her bag of tricks. And all I wanted to do was rest, and have some kind of ‘me time.’

She has two lamps in her room, albeit battery-operated ones, so perhaps the room was getting dimmer from the gradual battery strength lessening. However when I was getting her to finally lie down, and again she complained too dark, I just ripped out –

“We can’t have too many lights, you know why? The bugs will catch us. The bugs and spiders will find us because there are too many lights. So we can’t have too many lights. Goodnight!”

And you know what I got in return?

“Goodnight!”

Thank Fuck. I love Motherhood, but I also love that she is at an age to still buy these stories…

 

#495 Shopping with my girl no.4

Today was a day, that could have gone either way.

I had a long moment of frustration this morning. There is an aspect of my life that I’m struggling with, that I’m unable to talk about at the moment – hopefully I’ll be able too, sometime in the future.

I walked into the bathroom about midday, and had to breathe. I didn’t physically cry, but there were tears in my eyes, I had tension all about me, and all I wanted to do was give up. Give up, give in, and let the sorrow wash over me like the crashing waves in the horizon.

But then something happened. A little voice, tiny tiny, made a noise in my head. And it was enough to snap me out of my disillusioned haze to ask “how is your day going to be?”

And in that moment, I decided my sadness was NOT going to rule. It was NOT going to be the defining moment, feeling or event, of the day.

Still, it was a bit of a Let It Go day. Elsa sings it about letting go of her powers that she’s been holding in and hiding from everyone for so long. But I was using the term to not care. To just be. To not think too much, to allow myself to over-indulge, be free, merry and stress-free.

After baby girl and I surprised Hubbie with a little visit at his work, we headed on down to Bayside for some retail therapy. I am mindful that I shouldn’t be purging the account in light of important renos that need to be made to the house soon, but still, a little focused spending was necessary.

I Let It Go when we had Maccas for lunch (I had a chicken salad, but still ‘helped out’ with her Happy Meal)

I Let It Go when she got yet another toy, a doll that she was so happy to hold and hug (wait for it…)

and finally, I Let It Go when we sat down for coffee and a babycino, and instead of just coffee, I also got cake mofos:

Yep, that’s her new doll, Rapunzel. By the way, I forgot to mention that I Let Her Go, and leave the house in costume, Rapunzel-style herself. Because when else in life do you get to leave the house as a princess? I totally would have done Wonder Woman today if it were at all acceptable.

So yes. A bit of food, a bit of drink, a bit of toys, a lot of costume… and IT DID make me feel better.

But that was my attitude too. Deciding ‘we’re going to move on from this. We are.’

And WE did. For now…