We went 3 different ways today. Hubbie and I at our respective places of employment, baby girl at school.
Ahh. Grade 2 has begun.
Where has the last 2 years of primary school go? How is this the 3rd year already? How am I becoming a well known feature at the school, watching the oh-so-obvious new kids and parents step tentatively through the gates?
Grade 2 was such a good year for me. I had one of my best teachers then.
Actually, I had her twice. In grade 2 and in grade 5.
I was in room 16. One of my favourite numbers.
I look at baby girl now, and hope her grade 2 year is just as great as mine was, and brings her even more good times and memories.
As I look back at this time of iso, I notice little things that worked out to our advantage, or just happened to be a small light at the end of the tunnel.
Little things. But they make up the whole, right?
At the start of the year, I was NO JOKE, over 100 episodes behind on my Bold and Beautiful eps. I know, serious stuff.
I had way over 100 eps on my planner, and I actually thought there was no way I would catch up… ever.
But then… covid happened. Iso happened.
I was working from home. My morning commute went from a 2 hour 10 drive/train/walk journey, to a get-out-of-bed, trakkies, oh-here-I-am-downstairs-at-the-work-desk journey. In like, 5 minutes.
Suddenly, I didn’t have to be in bed so early…
And slowly but surely, sitting on the couch at the end of the night, I caught up.
Also, covid happened to Bold and the Beautiful too. They suspended production initially, showing only old eps… which I still watched.
Still, I caught up on them ALL.
But lately, it has been more than soap operas occupying my TV viewing.
7 days a week I am occupied with one thing or another.
From Monday night to Friday night, I’ve got it on channel 119 on Foxtel, and The Golden Girls and Cheers are playing out to me in the lounge room.
And if you’re shaking your head and laughing, then obviously you’ve never watched them! The Golden Girls are not just old ladies… they are actually quite rude, which makes them all the more hilarious!
And Cheers, well this one surprisingly, I haven’t watched in years… oddly for my age at the time, I remember watching this casually when I was in my pre-teens, about 12, and getting hooked on the Sam and Rebecca storyline… and now like 25 years later I am re-watching HOW they got together.
So that’s my Mon-Fri. I switch on the TV after everyone’s asleep. I sit on the couch with my laptop. Check my phone, write, pay bills, look things up, etc, etc… all while 4 golden girls get into all kinds of crazy scenarios, and then this woman-mad bartender gets into random escapades with his bar colleagues and local regulars there to support and ‘cheer’ him on.
The nights are fun:)
But that’s not all. These eps don’t play on the weekend, and just as well as I’ve found something else to fill in my time there too…
On the sci-fi channel… cue music:
For this show, I was like 16, and still remember tuning into the first premiering eps on TV… I came for David Boreanaz, enjoying my perve at him, but stayed ultimately for the incredible stories and world-building. It was so emotionally engaging, that I had to stop watching for a season and a half after becoming absolutely furious at the show’s sudden direction!
It remains one of my all-time favourite shows to this day. And honestly, it if weren’t for iso, I wouldn’t be watching much at the end of the night, weeknight or weekend.
But now, I get to remember. I get to reminisce. I would tell you to watch Angel, but that show is like a commitment. Because I tell everyone to first watch the first 3 seasons of Buffy before they watch Angel… but still, it’s a beautiful and rewarding commitment, an incredible journey that will make you cry more than laugh, but mostly will make you feel (then cry like a baby again).
So watch Angel. Watch Cheers too, it’s a fun show. Watch Golden Girls if you want some fluff to laugh at. They’re good fun.
Or just watch your own shows. Hell, we have time now, don’t we? Revisit something you used to LOVE. Or, still do. 💖
It felt as if time stood still for about 2 hours tonight, as we all sat down to watch a movie on the couch.
Well, time didn’t really stand still. If we did anything with time, we manipulatedit.
That’s right… it was Back to the Future time!
Pardon the overly obvious pun, but I HAD TO. After coming across the second installment of this classic 80s trilogy the other night on TV and watching the second half of it, Hubbie came home from work today actually wanting to watch the first one!
What? He wanted to watch a movie, and it was one of my faves???
I didn’t ask twice.
The box set came out!
Even baby girl got involved, and was actually intrigued for most of it, though she kept saying she liked the character of Duck best… when I told her it’s actually Doc, she said “no not Doc, Duck, the other guy!”
Time travelling movies are kind of hard to explain to a 6 year-old. I just ended with…
“It’s a bit tricky honey. You call him duck if you like.”
Daggy pun or not, it was amazing as we all sat together to pause life, if only a bit… as we questioned the past… pondered the present… and made room for a better future. ♥
Okay, so it’s not MY beach. But when your friends visit you from across town and ask for a beach-playdate-destination-recommendation, you kinda feel like a part of you is being exposed, on show for all to see.
I was pleased, because it was a pretty perfect beach day.
Still, sunny, but with some cloud cover at times. The water was mild. The kids had shallow waters.
Us Mums were (mostly) happy. Kids make that sentence ‘mostly.’ 🤣
But it wasn’t just the fun and frivolity of being on sand, or wading on water that made today fun and totally chillax-worthy.
I felt there was a lot of meaning attached to the day. Sure we were on the beach and all, but I couldn’t help thinking of how we had come to the beach that day.
I was thinking of friends, and friendship, A LOT. It was two of my oldest friends that I was with today. They with their brood, me with mine. And it had nothing to do with watching the kids play, fight, argue over who had the body board next or lie in the water and float, things we used to imagine way back when in high school when we’d say to one another that our kids would be friends just as we were.
It was more about the ‘time.’ That all-too-important commodity that everyone argues they have little to none of. I was thinking of how we were all there on the beach, dedicated to the task of spending time together, our kids having fun together, while there were so many other things in our life distracting us, so many other things we could do, and so many other places we could be.
But we chose to be there.
It was humbling. It was heart-warming. When someone chooses you to be the place they spend their time with, it is something special. In a world where the word ‘busy’ flies out of our mouths all too often, it was a day where we chose each other, and in doing so made one of the best sacrifices of time and best decisions possible:
Because we made memories for not only us, but THEM. ❤🏖
A sombre post today. Still with some gratitude, but definitely, sombre.
I was at a funeral today. It’s that event on the other side of the spectrum that makes you think. The event on the opposite side? A birth. Something so wondrous and magical that it feels as if all of life’s blessings have fallen upon your lap.
But death. That which is inevitable but which we don’t speak of.
Although both birth and death make us reflect and think about life, nothing quite shakes our core and makes us think about how far we have come, like the end of someone’s days.
IT IS INEVITABLE. Yet we don’t think about it, we don’t talk about it. I stood there in the church today, staring at the great bright and glowing chandelier above our heads, underneath where I married Hubbie, and where years later we christened our baby girl… thinking deeply.
How would my funeral be? Where would I be? Would I want to be remembered there, in an Orthodox church, a place of many beautiful memories for me personally, or in a church that spoke of my Catholic roots?
The answer came to me easily and abruptly. Despite my deep respect for my husband and his traditions, I wanted to go back to where I came from.
I shared this with Hubbie in the car, on the way to the cemetery. He nodded.
“Fair enough.” But that wasn’t enough for me. I continued.
“Have you ever thought who will be at your funeral? Like, it’s going to be those younger than us, most likely.” I started rattling off names of those near and dear who were a generation younger than us. I got choked up thinking of others.
“What about my friends?” Who of them would be at mine… or would I be at theirs? It was too much to bear. Suddenly the tears were welling up in my eyes and rolling down my cheeks. “How will it be? Who will be there to remember me?”
Hubbie reached out his hand to hold mine. “Don’t talk like that.” If anyone had thought of death, and of how grief took hold of your body, it was Hubbie. “Don’t think about it.”
And that’s what we do, don’t we? We go back to not thinking about it… not talking about it.
But like I said, death makes us think. And so it should. It makes us take stock of things, do a life inventory as it were, to see what makes us happy, if we are using our time wisely, and who we are spending that hard-earned time on… all sage questions, and things we should consider more often.
It made me think of those around me. Was I surrounding myself with the best people possible? Those who had my best interests at heart and made me happy? Would I be happy, at who turned up at my funeral?
So today I used this time to think. To contemplate and reassess what is around me. Put things in perspective. To remember to stress less, and LIVE MORE.
Because I have time. If you are reading this, YOU have time too. Take the event of death of a loved one as a most humble and sobering reminder to wake up to the signs of life and make sure you are on the right track… every day is a chance to start anew… every day is a chance to make your days count… and every day is a chance to make your life worthy and satisfying.
Make your relationships with your loved ones count. Surround yourself with the best people possible. Not just because they might be at your funeral… but because they should already be in your life, too.
In this last month or so at work, we wait with nervous anticipation at the sole mercy and direction of management, as to when it will be our last day.
Our job responsibilities have started migrating interstate – people will be starting to do our job, over there, in a number of days.
The countdown is on.
And today a work colleague observed something. She commented how our workload was reducing slowly, and in no time it would be the very small workload we used to have back in the day, when we first walked through those doors, many years ago.
A small workload, minuscule, compared to our job today. Weirdly, we observed that as we are nearing the end of our work days, we are coming full circle.
It isn’t just the workload though. I realised that not only were we going back in time with how much (or should I say, how little) we were meant to be doing… but we were also going back about a decade, to the same group of people.
Because those who had come after me, were already gone.Going. They had taken early leave… found another job… or left conveniently right when all of this craziness began.
Leaving me, and the original crew.
Those who were there when I arrived. Those who came shortly after. Those who were in other departments, but ended up joining ours over time.
It was going back, to the good ol’ days.
And although I share some special friendships with those who have already left… there is something nostalgic about walking out of those doors for the last time, alongside those you walked in with.
I know, it will be hard.
I say that I can’t wait to turn my back on the Docklands Winter and never have to work within its windy grasp again… but on that last shift, I will pause, and look at the water shimmering amidst boats in the morning dawn, and reflect.
I know I can’t wait to never have to set my alarm again for the insane hour of 5am… but come Wednesdays, and I’ll be wondering where all my colleagues are.
And I know I can’t wait to move on, and go onto bigger and better things… because I know they are waiting for me…
But it’ll be terribly bittersweet. I have been there for over 11 years.About a third of my life. And the friendships I’ve made, the drunk stories from Christmas parties I can tell, the gossip I’ve been privy to, the big news items I broke, the laughter, emails, in-jokes, work lingo, industry speak, insider knowledge, hour long d&ms, and the 45,721 coffee runs I’ve walked…
I know I will cry. People might put on a show and act like they don’t care.
But I do. The people and the memories will be with me always.
And so, it makes sense that at the end of the production line, we are slowly heading back, to day 1.
And with all that said… I don’t mind if they drag this out, just a little longer.
It’s an early post for me today, but sometimes you know in your heart of hearts, what you will think about for days, weeks, even months later, when you look back at a certain day.
And I know what I will think of when I look back on today.
It was the most beautiful day at baby girl’s kinder for her informal graduation ceremony, and Christmas family day. It was an early one this year, because the kindergarten teacher will be off overseas soon, and so they held the party today.
Never mind I am already having kinder withdrawals with 2 weeks to go. Not only will I miss the place terribly, the innocent culture, the amazing teachers, the kids, the community vibe… but I will miss their greenery.
After the kids sang some very sweet songs and Christmas songs to the parents, and were presented individually with a group photo congratulating them on their kindergarten participation, we took a couple of graduation hat photos, before heading off home with all her Christmas presents and goodies from the day.
I went through one of the bags at home. She had received book upon book upon book. I instructed her to put them under the Christmas tree, and she promptly did so, as I came upon an envelope…
I peered inside.
There were photos.
As I started to pull them out, I gasped, and burst into tears.
It was tears of happiness. Tears of gratitude. Giant, sobbing, shoulder-heaving tears. I went through the photos, only half a dozen, but photos that showed my daughter playing at kinder. Interacting with others. Playing with her friends. Mucking about on the slide. Posing in capes.
I tearfully went through each one, pouring over it enthusiastically while trying to gain an inside glimpse of her kindergarten life from the brief snapshots I had.
They were soooo valuable to me… because baby girl rarely tells me what happens at kinder.
She will tell me dribs and drabs. Who she sat next to for lunch. Whether she had a turn on the spiderweb swing or not. How many times she went to the loo. She seems persistent to not tell me much at all, and though I try to find ways to ease the information out of her, and the teachers put up photos of their various activities week in and week out, I still don’t get the feedback I so crave.
Which is why I figuratively clutched the photos to my heart when I saw them.
It was a build up of everything. How far she had come. How far she had grown. Where she had started when she started there last year, to today, standing front row during the songs and singing loudly “there’s a reindeer on my roof!”
I am so happy today. So proud. Time goes on, and sometimes it goes slow, yet sometimes it goes fast…
And it’s on days like today, these brief glimpses within our lives, where we look back and say “wow. Here we are.”
What can you do in 15 minutes? Rather, if you find yourself with a little free time, what do you usually fill that time up with?
A phone call?
Clear up that corner mess?
Pay some bills online?
Start folding the laundry?
15 minutes can come and go by so quickly, that we often don’t make the most of it – in a personal sense. Instead we pass the time by doing some odd boring job, most of the time one of our ‘never-ending tasks’… you know the ones, that like boomerangs always come back, no matter how many times we do it?
We tend to put off doing anything good or fulfilling for ourselves, usually saying “I’ll do it when I have MORE time.”
“When I don’t feel so tired.”
“When it’s not a Sunday.”
“When I don’t have groceries in the car.”
“When I have planned for it better.”
Today, after our quick stop at the shops, I had all of the above reasons and more as we grappled with the idea… to stop at the coastline, or head straight back home?
Hmm, it seemed like such a good idea.
But, was it? We were tired. We still had sooo much cleaning to do at home post-birthday bash celebrations, so that mammoth task was still awaiting us and looming in our minds…
We decided for and against as we drove down the main beach road in our town, swaying like a pendulum as we went to, fro, to, fro…
Until I said “stuff it.”
I turned right – it was to be TO.
WHY DID WE EVEN WONDER IF THERE WAS ANY ARGUMENT BUT FOR THE BEACH???
So often we put our enjoyable moments on the backburner, waiting for the most perfect, opportune time.
But any moment can be the perfect time. Any moment you can manage it. We need to stop living in such limiting ways so as to think “oh, I am too busy.”
You are NOT too busy to make yourself happy.
You are NOT too busy to make yourself smile.
You are NOT too busy to give yourself a timeout and a chance to enjoy the life that you live, doing whatever it is that makes you, and only you, uniquely happy.
So today we sat on a brick wall, breathed in some lovely sea air, and decided, we are going to make the most out of life, whether that includes the beach or not.