#480 Her affectionate nature no.2

“Ugh,” I groaned. I was over it. Baby girl was going for yet another book.

Any other night and I would have just bared it. Tonight however, I was feeling ‘it’ again. Under the weather. Tired. Weak. Sore throat. The last few weeks this is how I’ve been… how we’ve all been. The cold comes, the cold goes.

Great, I thought. This Winter cold is ‘up’ again.

She came back to her bed with a second book, while I closed my eyes and willed myself to remain calm.

The sooner I read it, the sooner it’ll be over, and then I’ll be able to go to sleep.

I started reading an old faithful: In The Night Garden.

“The night is black and the stars are bright,

and the sea is dark and deep,

and someone I know is safe and snug

and drifting off to sleep…”

Baby girl was grabbing at my free hand, and appeared to be doing something to it… tickling it? Was she drawing circles in it the way I used to do to her hand, during this part of the story?

It occurred to me as she straightened my fingers. “Do you want to hold hands?” I closed mine around hers.

“Yeah.”

Awww. Immediately, all the frustration I’d been feeling melted away. She wanted to hold hands and have me read to her? This girl is the cheekiest and smartest and most challenging of monkeys at times, but when she pulls things like this, my heart can barely cope with the onslaught of love. Simultaneous guilt for wanting to go and sleep, versus enormous gratitude for this moment emerged.

Always more gratitude though, because glass half-full gal and all…

I squeezed her hand into mine and kept reading.

“Round and round a little boat,

No bigger than your hand.

Out in the ocean,

Far away from land…”

 

#372 Getting used to the burn

Last week following my Zumba home workout, and my short ab crunching spell that was in line with something I had seen in an online video by a health instructor, I felt elated. Full of energy. Excited at this new start, this new me, and this new version of SmikG that got to have ‘her time,’ when baby girl was at kinder.

More of me was coming back, baby.

But. Then I got tired. Sleepy. Flat. I hadn’t exercised in a long time, in terms of exercise you do when you are doing repeated steps in order to feel burn in certain places. The type of exercise where I am run off my feet with baby girl and house tasks, sure, I freaking excel at.

But an actual workout? Nah. The closest thing had been pre-natal yoga, 4 years ago.

I had felt the burn alright. In my tummy. Below my buttocks. I was a bit dismayed that I felt so tired following it, that I didn’t quite know what to expect today.

Well. I’ve been trying to do my ab crunches where I can in the last week. And then as I took out my trusty Zumba dvd again today, completing one workout… I finished feeling… FINE.

Ok, I thought. Time to do the online video from my phone.

I copied the short sequence of movements, lasting a few minutes.

I felt the ab burn ALRIGHT, HARD. But still… I felt FINE.

I was waiting for it. And waiting for it. I thought I knew what was to come…

‘Now I’ll feel tired and screwed for the rest of the day.’

And yet surprisingly, happily, I didn’t. I didn’t feel tired. Weak. I went about the rest of my time, running around the house doing various tasks, and feeling invigorated. I felt GREAT!

Sure, I feel pretty tired now. I haven’t stopped all day. But I am so happy that I didn’t get that flat feeling following my workout like I did last week, as it allowed me to  go through my day with boundless energy, and a strong sense of grabbing life by the balls and saying “Hey YOU!  I’m in charge today!”

And I sure was. All because I’m getting used to the burn 🙂

 

#367 The calm after the Partays

Thursday was a full on day. Kinder for baby girl. My 5 hours ‘off,’ were actually crammed in with everything and anything I could think of.

We had visitors over that night, my cousins.

Friday night (yesterday) we had an engagement. I slept 4 hours. Got up to work today. Groggily.

We had a birthday on tonight. Drove to the other side of town. Drove back. I don’t know how many hours of sleep I’ll get tonight. I’m working tomorrow, again.

And although there is one more ‘task,’ to tick of my to-do list, that of work for the weekend, I sure am glad that the festivity part is over, at least for now.

Don’t get me wrong. I love heading out, getting dressed up, having fun, socialising, and watching baby girl thrive amidst it all.

But I haven’t stopped. I’m tired. I still need to work. We’re all getting under the weather.

We just need to stop and take a moment to breathe. In peace.

And so, I am hopeful, that finally the calm has come. And I’m so grateful for it.

#193 Coming home on a Sunday night

I love being out, amongst good company, and especially love being at my parents house with good company… as we were today for Father’s Day. I can never bore when my parents, or sister, or bro-in-law, or nephews are there. I love them all.

However, I also love coming home. And there was no sweeter cherry, on top of the delicious cake of a day we had with our family today, than when we walked through our own doors, put the heater on, and got in our pyjamas before dinner time.

We’ve had a big weekend, and now it’s time for a big sleep.

‘Night.