#852 Sweet reminiscings, and bittersweet goodbyes

Sugar prevailed today.

Some was of a transient quality, the kind you get when you visit a place you used to frequent often, a long long time ago.

That is a rather poetic way of saying that I caught up with my parents in a shopping centre on the other side of town. I used to go there fairly regularly, and I swear I don’t know what it is, but I miss the shopping centres on my old side of town so much. The three I used to alternate between visiting had a variety of shops, gave me a different experience at each one, and also, all three were relatively close compared to my now 40 minute drive to either Southland or Chadstone.

Of course, once there, coffee was in order.

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Like I said. Reminiscently sweet.

🙂

And then I had one of my last late, late work shifts tonight, because well, someone will be taking over the reigns soon, THANK GOD. No more driving home post 1am. But this night held something else over good riddance to crappy late shifts… a dear work colleague who I have worked with for the past 8 years, well tonight was her last shift… before starting the most important job of her life – becoming a Mum.

To see her off properly, again, sugar.

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There was cake galore, some brought in by her, some brought in by me. I decided to eat it all at once, but then I didn’t know if the ill feeling was from overconsumption, or the realisation I wouldn’t be seeing her anymore at work past tonight.

😩

Sweets that help us remember, and sweets that help us to pay tribute. Their unifying theme is the moment of gratitude we hold when we look back in appreciation and understanding… that things change, people move on, and people move away… but we can still remember these things fondly and hold them dear to our hearts…

Keeping the memories sweet in our hearts. ♄

 

#803 New place, old feels

I was in a new place within my old ‘hood today…

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And no matter how new and improved some places become, still, the ‘feels’ remain. The emotions and memories and time spent there with loved ones, the catch-ups and stories you can tell about what happened many moons ago, well those are priceless. No amount of renovating could take that away.

I have no qualms about new and improved, and renovations. Noooo, siree. I caught up with an old work friend in the new entertainment eatery section of Westfield in Plenty Valley, and while baby girl had a ball climbing in the above NEW suspended rope tunnels in the funky outdoor area, I enjoyed a bird and brie burger from an eatery which may or may not have been there before… but it was still all NEW to me.

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I am happy for changing and for trying new things, embracing what is ahead while still holding onto what is dear to me from the past. That was what was representative of today.

And over time, those new places give you new feels, which over time turn into old feels… and that’s how memories are made 🙂

#785 The fam bam catch-up

Just recently I was reminiscing about the days when my parents would just up and – SURPRISE! At my front door they would be, with baby girl squealing about their blue car through the window.

A surprise visit is easy when you live 7 minutes away. Not so when it suddenly extends to 1 hour and 20 minutes.

So those memories, are a bit long gone. Sadly for me.

But then wait! Apparently, the surprise visit is back! Ok well not with a full-on, unexpected SURPRISE! at the front door… today’s one came with an 8:30am sms forewarning, and then several hours later they arrived at my door with even more visitors, my sister and nephew in tow…

But like I said, things have changed. 1 hour 20 minutes changed.

And that is what I am grateful for today. Sometimes with a change such as a Sea Change move like ours, it takes a long while to fall back into some kind of normalcy, some kind of routine, something I will always argue we ALL need for the sake of getting our shit together.

And then when things settle…

the SURPRISE!s come back.

And I expect a lot more of them too now. ;););)

Life is fluid, it’s in a state of constant progress, always changing… but if you’re lucky enough, sometimes you can hold onto what you had before, in some form, during its transition…

 

 

#736 Cherishing the “Mama”s

“Help me Mama.”

“Mama can you come play with me, pleeeeaaaasssseeeee?”

“Mama where are you? Mama?!”

“No Mama, me do it by self.”

“Thank you Mama.”

(In the middle of the night) “Mama!”

I find it hard to remember the transition. The transition from when baby girl was a baby and not yet saying “Mama,” to when she was older and then suddenly, it was ONLY Mama.

Maybe because it is so swift a change. They say it a handful of times and you clap your hands in glee, with tears welling at the corners of your eyes, and then in a few days time they are following you with repeated “Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama…”

And you sigh a little and grumble under your breath “great.”

But today, on another quiet and down day, I took the time to try and be present in the moment, and in doing so, I heard her sweet voice.

“Mama.”

I hope she calls me like that for the rest of our lives.

And then at some point today…

“Mama… I like you best.”

HEART SWELLING.

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Photo by Arleen wiese on Unsplash

 

#665 Sunday family day and realigning

I could be grateful that we spent a good portion of the day shopping, and got a bit more of our Christmas list ticked off… but with all that has been happening with life lately, the busyness, the reality and the true meaning of it, I just ain’t feeling the grateful shopping vibe.

Another day, maybe. Today, it feels too materialistic for the realisations that the day brought us. And maybe, I’m sick of spending so much $$$ in the festive lead-up.

Instead, I had the best time after we got home. We had driven home in the sunny sunshine, and then spent the afternoon not doing so much. In line with this relaxed vibe we got some charcoal chicken, but maybe also (ahem, HUGELY) due to the fact that our kitchen is still a W.I.P.

I had so much on my mind, and laid it all out to Hubbie.

We decided in a change of plans. We have been discussing a simpler, easier, more stress-free, carefree and happier life for about week now, but it was decided for sure tonight, that that WAS going to happen.

Life is short. We are only here once. We plan so much for the future, and often, things change so much. We need to be willing to adapt, roll with the punches, and attune ourselves to our environment in order to survive.

What we were sure of years ago, we are now not so. So we are changing. I am grateful for the relaxed Sunday vibes that allowed us to get to that place, and I am happy that my husband is also in the same ‘place,’ as I am.

Super-duper important in ANY relationship.

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Photo by Jordan Ladikos on Unsplash

 

 

#374 Reclaiming the past with Besties

Tonight, Bestie and her Hubbex came over to visit us in our new ‘hood.

It was a pretty rad night.

We have a pretty awesome history, us 4. I often wonder if the looks we get from other ‘friends’ are that of jealousy: I mean, bestie and I are of course, LONG-TIME besties, and when we get together, our Hubbies become equally as tight and crazy as us.

We were an integral part of their bridal party when they got married, which was right before I got pregnant with baby girl. It was an amazing day, and so special to be sharing it with them both, in such a close and intimate way.

But that was not the beginning, and it sure as hell won’t be the end. No. Our times together have many prior years and years on their wedding day… from after our high school years and through all of our twenties, birthdays and events, days out, dinner, catch-ups and plenty of laughter here, there and EVERYWHERE. I’m talking Hubbie and Hubbex jumping out of our semi-moving car after midnight singing “How Bizarre” at the top of their lungs on a Saturday night. I’m talking funny dress-ups, and stupid faces to the point that when we look back on them now, we laugh ourselves so silly that we do unintentional ab crunches from our laughter, our breath soundless and eyes all screwed up from the mad laughter that we are expressing.

I’m talking wine, I’m talking shots, and I’m talking plenty of D&Ms in-between. When I think of our long-standing history together, and think back through all of those years, I then realise how varied, vast and deep our friendship and experiences with one another are.

And generally speaking, I am proud of the maturity I’ve developed in response to the friendships and relationships in my life. Nothing remains static, stagnant. Things are ever-changing, and so too do many friendships take on a temporary ‘on hold’ spell, while life takes over, other things become more of a priority, and you move in different directions.

I love that quote, that says something like you know you have a true friend when you don’t always see each other, but when you get together it’s like no time has passed. Nothing is truer for this awesome-foursome.

Although all our lives are extremely busy, and we all have differing passions and interests and jobs that keep us entertained and out of trouble, we still make the time for each other, when we can. And tonight, while eating and drinking, listening to a whole variety of musicians and getting extremely excited over them, talking the deep philosophy of BeyoncĂ©’s image, pruning roses, allowing baby girl to do multiple renditions of Let it Go, turning our staircase into ‘ice’ as she stamped down on the landing, and shooing off cats, we had a smashing time.

We have matured, we are older, and we have more responsibility present in our lives… but it is still us. And US, has still got IT.

Take care of your true friends, because it takes a long time to gain an ‘old friend.’ They are precious and much sought after.

After tonight, I think our future together looks just as happy/funny/silly/meaningful/profound/bright, as ever 🙂

 

#242 D&M with Hubbie

It may strike some as unusual that I’m having a bad time at the moment.

But then, if you know that we’ve recently moved house, it may not come as such a surprise.

Everything is off-centre, backwards, outdated, trying, and so ridiculously wrong that it is almost laughable. I feel like Mr Bean and someone up there is laughing their arse off at my expense.

No gas, means no heater. This coincided with some of the coldest days over the weekend, and I was terrified for some moments thinking we had Sea changed to the coldest part of the state, until I discovered that fam and friends on the other side of the city were too, miserably unhappy with the weather.

I got rained on 3 times in 2 days. The last time I got rained on was 4 years ago. And when it happened this weekend, I couldn’t even dry off properly. Heater issue, above.

I’m feeling isolated. Family and friends are not around.

Boxes are everywhere. Not having my shit together is keeping me restless and scatterbrained.

I haven’t slept properly in 2 weeks. Lack of sleep due to packing before the move, and now here, lack of sleep due to baby girl waking in the middle of the night because of the new house.

Everything is getting to me. Everything was getting to me. I had a few sorry moments this afternoon… and as down as I was feeling, after I spoke to hubbie and purged all my worries and stresses onto him, I slowly, eventually came to turn around.

The power of someone who has your back, is enormous. I am so grateful to him for his listening ears, helpful heart, searching eyes and loving soul. He did not give up until he made sure, I wasn’t going to.

It’s a tough time of life at the moment. We are settling. Things are up in the air. Things aren’t working the way they should. We are out of our comfort zone.

But, I know that. I knew that, before all this happened. I just didn’t think it would be so hard.

But, as long as I’m out of my comfort zone with hubbie and baby girl, things are good.

Following our D&M, I’m looking up again.